After two successful days in a row at work, I am feeling more and more optimistic that the decision to start on medication was the best for me.
Today my heart didn’t drop anytime someone mentioned my name. To be fair I did have some nerves waking up this morning, but they quickly went away. My nervous energy seems almost nonexistent. It used to feel like I was teetering on the edge of a cliff. Today I felt like steady Freddy. My hands weren’t shaking. My thoughts were focused. It all sounds too good to be true.
The side effects to the Prozac have not been very noticeable enough for me to pay much attention to them. They certainly don’t outweigh the positive effects I’ve been feeling even on the lowest dose.
I’m not sure if I want to change the dosage this upcoming week like the doctor suggested. I think I’ll be contacting her soon. I don’t want to be “over medicated” if it’s not necessary.
I’ve lived with anxiety for so long. Over a decade. I remember my first panic attack that left me drenched in sweat in a classroom in high school. Looking like the crazy kid. I remember running out of grocery stores while my mom stood in the check out lane. Multiple times. I remember getting tunnel vision and losing my breakfast on my way to the bus stop because I couldn’t deal.
I will gladly take this little blue pill.
I’ve enjoyed my children so much these last few days. As well as enjoyed spending quality time with my husband. I was paying attention. I was there and present and happy and laughing.
I know this isn’t everyone’s experience with anxiety or medication, but it’s mine and I’m glad I’ve done this for me. Finally.
The Prozac Parent 